Girl Under the Rocks

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– Rithika Cherukat

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In my first year of college, I made the acquaintanceship of a batchmate, whom, to maintain anonymity, I will proceed to call Lanky Boy. (This serves my purpose well, because God knows half the boys in college fit the description perfectly.) Now, Lanky Boy and I hit it off quickly, considering that we’d started talking only after a better part of the year had passed, and we soon became friends. One of the foundations of our friendship was that pretty early on, he noticed my apparent inability to catch pop culture references or even inside jokes made in a friend circle I was very much a part of. Thinking back, even learning of Lanky Boy’s existence was a rather accidental affair for me, despite him having been an established member of our group long before then.  

Really, it didn’t concern me. It didn’t concern me that I was so far behind the rest of the world that I was basically the 19th Century.  It didn’t concern me that people could have entire conversations in my presence and everything would go over my head because I didn’t watch that popular movie, or that popular tv show, or read that popular book. And it definitely didn’t concern me that for the most part, I was being an ignorant prick about mainstream media. After all, there is something almost entirely unique (read: strange) about someone who doesn’t follow something as heavily consumed and ruminated over as mass media, and I wore this uniqueness as a badge of honour. What Marvel Cinematic Universe? Here’s a list of indie/arthouse movies you should definitely watch- except I didn’t watch some of those either.

This behaviour was also the major contributor to my knowledge of local gossip, or rather the lack of it. They say ignorance is bliss, and I lived blissfully. I just didn’t care when things happened, and friends were always bewildered when I didn’t know of some news until long after it had become history. I didn’t socialize much, I didn’t know many of my batchmates, I never ventured to begin a conversation, and my closest friends had noticed this. My response to all these criticisms was to rather self-deprecatingly say that I lived under a rock. Lanky Boy caught on to this habit of mine and proceeded to call me the Girl Under the Rocks, or GUTR for short. It was a funny little (long) nickname, and I didn’t think much of it.

But then, I got into ISTE. Into Chronicle, the literary Special Interest Group, to be precise.

It was naturally assumed that, writing being the one thing that I loved to do more than anything, I would fit in right away. This was not to be. If anything, I felt uneasy at least until our freshers’. The reason was this: skill may be a priority, but in Chronicle, so is a love for pop culture. Our events are always intricate and well thought-out, and as a member who had experience participating in some of these events in my first year, I was surprised at the amount of planning that went into them. Heck, I was even proud to be able to contribute. But there was a problem; I wasn’t prepared for the amount of knowledge in mainstream media required to accomplish some of these tasks.  I couldn’t toss out references like the others did at meetings. I couldn’t write character sketches or make games centred around some literary universe. For me, this meant I was lacking in technical skill. I wasn’t Chronicle enough. Add to this my tendency to avoid social interaction unless necessary, and you might be able to see why it took so long for me to settle into this extraordinarily extraverted and talented group.

As the year ended and I came out of it wiser, I decided I was going to start doing two things:

a) Interact more with my fellow club members, and;
b) Watch some new movie or show that is currently being talked about.

This was not only an exercise in personality development, but also a way to discern why these two things were related, as by that point in my tenure in ISTE I was certain that they were.

An opportunity presented itself in the form of The Incredibles 2. I know, it’s definitely not like, say, GoT or The Avengers or * insert very popular movie or show here * but overtime it has built a fanbase consisting mostly of deeply nostalgic members who want to revisit their childhood, and to that end it had managed to stay relevant for a good 14 years.  Therein lay my first lesson: it takes effort to be popular, and even more to stay popular.

My second lesson was found in the darkness of the movie hall as we waited for the show to begin. Many critics claim that mainstream movies are becoming mediocre. For the longest time, I agreed. But now I see that there are great popular movies out there that take a clichéd or overused theme and put a twist to it. The innovation attracts the audience and opens up the genre to wider spheres. The Incredibles did that to superhero movies; instead of introducing us to a typical brooding lone wolf that was a staple of most movies of the category at the time, the movie shows us a family that leads a pretty normal and relatable daily life- except for the whole possessing-superpowers-thing of course. The central theme of the movie is the family, and their superpowers are just a tool in building their story. Genres define the core of a movie’s personality, much like they do about a person’s; in fact, there are plenty of research papers out there studying the same, but that doesn’t mean that all movies of one genre should have the same storyline. Movies- even mainstream ones- that redefine the genre they belong to with their storyline tend to be considered unique, again, just like how some people can have similar traits but still maintain their individuality.

By the time I had left the hall that day, I was completely captivated. The movie was incredible- pun intended- and I had actually socialized with my friends that day. I was awfully tired and emotionally drained, but I elected to ignore it because I had accomplished something huge; it felt like the culmination of my mission for the year. Little did I know that my third and final lesson was well on its way, travelling by bus from Bangalore with the rest of my friends and classmates.

A week ago, it presented itself. I was talking to my close friend and confidant about my idea for this blog post and how it was a personal account of what I felt were my shortcomings as a Chronicle member and a human in an actively social environment, and he listened patiently until the very end, only to say this: ‘Rithika, I believe you’re overthinking.’

Months of preparation went down the drain.

‘WHAT?!’ I gesticulated. ‘You don’t think I should write about this? Do you not agree with my idea? Oh, you think it’s not such a big deal, don’t you? Well you haven’t gone through the embarrassme-’

‘No. I just think that you are missing out on some facts.’ He cut me off.

‘Like what?’

‘Like the fact that you got into Chronicle through your own calibre, and that you do have some wonderful and close relationships with your friends. That you don’t like watching or reading a certain genre or form of entertainment doesn’t change any of that. Not all conversations revolve around pop culture. Sometimes you talk about things that I don’t know much about. What about that?’

I let out a half-annoyed, half-relieved sigh as I pondered over what he said. ‘What’s most important in an honest, friendly interaction is that you should be nothing but yourself. It’s nice to go out and make friends, but you don’t have to make that your life’s mission. What was the goal of the entire family in the Incredibles?’

‘To get their superhero status back.’ I replied slowly, uncertain of where this was going.

‘Right. In short, to be who they really are. Isn’t that what you should be doing too?’

 

Since that eye-opening (at least for me) conversation, I have been more accepting of myself as someone who is interested in all things literary. I have realized that it’s okay to miss out on things, no matter how good they might be and no matter how much people might say that you definitely should not miss out on that Next Big Thing.  I only have to watch or read or take part in any social activity only if I am genuinely interested in it. This was why my friend’s words meant so much to me. After all, when you spend so much time under a rock, your mind tends to go places.

Lesson three: Don’t be your own bully. You are fine. Especially you, Cherukat. You are absolutely fine.